Me Bad

Above is a scan of a certificate signed and mailed to me by Seattle Minister Rick Reynolds, director of Operation Nightwatch, pictured at left wearing what is undoubtedly an imported stole made by Central Americans willing to work all day for one US dime so they can eat meat once a week and eventually send their kids to school wearing shoes, instead of naked. If you can't read what the arrow is pointing to, clicking on the image will get you a larger more legible version.

Having never actually used a shelter during any of the times I've been homeless, owing to the PTSD and all, I had no idea of the protocol involved. I thought if I didn't show up to Rick Reynold's tent on time he would just wedge someone else into it in my place.

I've already attempted to excuse myself on Rick Reynold's blog. Here's what happened: Anitra, not I, asked if we could sleep in Pastor Rick's tent at the City Hall camp out on Thursday. He said OK. We had no agreed-upon ETA. After the dinner though, I wanted to go home and nap in a real bed and watch the Daily Show and the Colbert Report before camping. After all, I'm too old to lie on concrete for a whole 15 hours. I thought 8 or 9 hours would be sufficient. Besides, I had to go home to get my stuffed skunk and change into my ninja-homeless-camper costume.

Here's the very bad thing Anitra and I did. We forgot to tell Pastor Rick we'd be back after midnight. Then, when we got back and were ready to crash, we were sorry, because we didn't know if Pastor Rick and the other clergy in his tent were asleep or not.

Oh, the moral dilemma! On the one hand, I desperately wanted to wake a bunch of clergy up and loudly set myself and my woman down amongst them, and prattle on for an hour or two about anything that crossed my mind. That is JUST the sort of thing I like to do to people! On the other hand, it's wrong to wake a sleeping minister. So we asked around and got into a tent with some other night people like ourselves.

I know now that my excuse is unacceptable and I earned the one-night bar that I have received. I will never violate shelter protocol ever again.